Are dating apps truly inclusive? Here’s how gender inclusivity in dating apps is evolving — and what needs to change next.
Isn’t just a checkbox anymore. It’s a conversation. A movement. And honestly — a necessary evolution in how we swipe, match, and connect.
Dating apps were built for binary choices: male/female, straight/gay. But real humans don’t fit into two neat little boxes. And we never did.
The good news? That’s starting to change. The bad news? Not fast enough.
Where dating apps got it wrong
Most apps used to ask: “Are you a man or a woman?” That’s it. No nuance. No in-between. No space for gender-fluid, trans, non-binary, or queer identities.
That meant millions of people either mislabelled themselves to use the app — or skipped it entirely. Not exactly the definition of inclusive design.
Why gender options aren’t just “woke” — they’re survival
For gender-diverse folks, being forced to choose “man” or “woman” isn’t just annoying. It can be invalidating. Dangerous. Exhausting.
When someone can’t share their identity without fearing rejection or harassment, the app isn’t safe — and the experience isn’t real.
Apps that are doing better (finally)
Some dating apps are catching up — slowly, but surely. A few examples:
- OkCupid – Over 20 gender identity options + orientation choices
- Hinge – Lets users write in gender and add pronouns
- Bumble – Offers multiple gender and sexual orientation settings
- Taimi – LGBTQ+ inclusive from the ground up
It’s a step forward. But the work isn’t just about form fields. It’s about culture, safety, and actual respect.
Real talk: representation isn’t just about identity — it’s about experience
Inclusive apps do more than allow different gender options. They ask:
- Does the algorithm prioritise cis-straight matches?
- Are trans users protected from harassment?
- Do bios and prompts let queer people express themselves safely?
- Does moderation respond when things go wrong?
If an app adds “non-binary” but still auto-matches them based on outdated settings — that’s not progress. That’s performative UX.
#LetsTalkGenderIn: A campaign that called this out
The #LetsTalkGenderIn campaign started as a callout to dating platforms that kept gender options exclusive or limited. It challenged them to redesign with real inclusivity in mind — not just rainbow graphics in June.
It sparked real changes. Some apps updated their gender fields. Others added pronoun options. A few launched queer-first features like “pronoun badges” and visibility settings.
But the conversation’s not over. It’s just beginning.
Internal reads worth exploring:
What real gender inclusivity looks like
It’s not just about being “open-minded.” It’s about:
- Letting users self-identify (without limits)
- Using inclusive language across prompts and profiles
- Providing safety tools for reporting, blocking, and filtering
- Training moderators on LGBTQIA+ issues
- Creating space for asexual, demisexual, and non-binary identities
Why this matters for everyone (not just LGBTQ+ users)
Inclusivity doesn’t subtract from anyone’s experience — it expands it. The more authentic people can be on these platforms, the better your chances of meeting someone who truly fits.
And that’s the whole point of dating, right?
What still needs to change
Despite improvements, most mainstream apps still:
- Hide gender options behind menus
- Fail to educate users about pronouns or identities
- Leave trans and non-binary users exposed to trolling
Change starts with design — but it only works if backed by community moderation, education, and feedback loops.
Also read:
The future of dating apps is fluid
Love doesn’t follow binary rules. Neither should your app.
The more options we give people to express who they are — the better the matches, the deeper the connections, and the more human dating feels again.
Gender inclusivity in dating apps isn’t a bonus feature. It’s a must-have. And we’re not waiting around anymore.