Are You Over-Customising Your Personality?
One month you’re clean girl, next month you’re grunge fairy, then cottagecore on Sundays. Reinvention is fun—but constant personality customising can leave you exhausted and unsure of who you are. If your vibe changes every time a new trend hits, it might be time to choose authenticity over algorithm.
What “Over-Customising” Looks Like
- Editing your takes to match what’s popular that week
- Buying items for a vibe you don’t actually live
- Switching opinions to keep the peace or get likes
- Feeling anxious when your feed doesn’t “fit” the aesthetic
Why We Do It
- Belonging: Trends promise instant community.
- Visibility: Algorithms reward recognisable aesthetics.
- Safety: Agreeing feels less risky than standing out.
Authenticity ≠ One Static Brand
Being yourself isn’t a rigid identity; it’s a value-aligned range. You can love sneakers and saris, K-pop and classical, quiet nights and protest marches. The point is: you choose—not the trend cycle.
4-Box “Self vs. Trend” Audit
- Always Me: Things you love on- and offline.
- Sometimes Me: Seasonal or mood-based (keep lightly).
- Audience Me: What you post for clout—question these.
- Not Me: Aesthetics you chase but never enjoy—release them.
Rebuild from the Inside Out
- Values first: Choose 3 words (e.g., depth, play, ease). Use them to filter choices.
- Inputs second: Follow 20% fewer look-alike creators; add diverse voices.
- Habits third: Build rituals you’d keep even if phones vanished.
Scripts to Stop Shape-Shifting
- “That trend’s cool, but it’s not me.”
- “I’m trying fewer, deeper interests this season.”
- “I’m letting my style catch up to my life, not the feed.”
30-Day Authenticity Plan
- Week 1: Unfollow/mute 25 “comparison” accounts.
- Week 2: Wear/use what feels like you for 7 days straight.
- Week 3: Post one thing that’s honest but un-aesthetic.
- Week 4: Start a private project you won’t share (journal, sketchbook).
Final Thoughts
Customize your phone, not your soul. Trends can inspire, but they shouldn’t erase you. Choose a self that outlives the season.
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