Adulting Is a Scam—but Here’s How to Cope
Why Adulting Feels Like a Scam
- Unrealistic expectations: We were sold the idea that education = stable job = happiness. Reality? Not so simple.
- Invisible labour: Cleaning, cooking, budgeting, networking—it all eats time and energy but rarely gets recognition.
- Financial pressure: Rent, loans, healthcare, groceries—costs rise faster than paychecks.
- Constant comparison: Social media highlights others’ wins while you struggle with basic tasks.
The Emotional Side of Adulting
It’s not just logistics; it’s the mental load—the juggling of schedules, remembering birthdays, worrying about career paths, and managing relationships. No one sees this labour, but it’s exhausting. Naming it helps: you’re not weak, you’re carrying a lot.
Practical Coping Tools
- Break tasks into micro-steps: Instead of “sort finances,” try “open bank app → check balance → pay one bill.”
- Batch boring stuff: Laundry, emails, meal prep—group them into one block so they don’t bleed into every day.
- Create anchor routines: Morning stretch, Sunday planning, Friday night wind-down—anchors make chaos manageable.
- Use reminders: No one remembers everything. Calendar and note apps are lifelines, not crutches.
Reframe “Failure”
Did you forget to pay a bill? Burn dinner? Miss a deadline? That doesn’t make you bad at adulthood—it makes you human. The trick is to treat mistakes as feedback loops, not character flaws.
Build an Adulting Support Squad
Adulthood wasn’t meant to be solo. Find peers who will:
- Swap skills (you cook, they fix tech).
- Share resources (templates, apps, tips).
- Remind you that struggling is normal.
Financial Survival Basics
- 50-30-20 rule: Needs (50%), wants (30%), savings/debt (20%).
- Track spending: Even two weeks of logging reveals leaks.
- Start small: ₹500/$10 a week into savings adds up more than waiting for “extra.”
Self-Care That Isn’t Expensive
- 15 minutes of stretching or walking daily.
- Cooking one meal that makes you feel good.
- Screen-free evenings once a week.
- Journaling frustrations so they don’t spiral.
Final Thoughts
Yes, adulting feels like a scam—too much labour, too little reward. But you can build resilience by reframing expectations, asking for help, and creating systems that make life lighter. The truth? No one has it all figured out. The best you can do is build a life that feels sustainable and kind to you.
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