Ways To Decide Who Should Move Out When Getting Divorced?

 Separation from your partner is the most painful thing ever yet you need to make down breathtaking decisions for your betterment. Awareness about your rights on taking the decisions on the phase of separation or divorce is quintessential. 

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Generally, in 90% of the cases, both the partners are adamant about not moving out. But, who do you think should move out? Well, it's a great question, and to get its answer, you need to have detailed information on the possibilities. 


The intent of the blog below is to help you overcome the phase of life where you are forced to choose who should move out or stay in the house once you plan to divorce. 


How to determine who should move out at the time of getting divorced?

The decision of who should and who shouldn't move out can be made out of multiple factors and questions. 


  1. Consider Children future before coming to the conclusion 

Your final decision should revolve around your children and their needs. The toxic family culture can lead to unseen trauma and depression in your children as they learn things through this phase. Keep in mind that you have children in place, who need both parents to complete their life. Either one of the missing parents can destroy your kids mentally without your notice. 


For example, once in the US, a man who got divorced from his wife later hired a mother to take care of his three children. Although the hired lady replaced the place of his children's mother, the extra financial expenses bombarded his head - which he paid to the hired temporary mother to look after his kids.


  1. State clear reason to stay in or go out of the house

Make sure to put across the claims to stay in the house that is fair and practical. You both should sit and prepare a list stating all the points why you should stay and why another person should leave. While preparing the list of all the pros and cons, make sure to consider it from all perspectives. Then discuss your points maturely and take the practical decision based on them. 


  1. Answer yourself if you are mature and financially independent enough to feed the family 

In the interim of the fight - Who shall stay & Who shall walk out of the house - don't forget the fact that you both have a family after you to feed! If being a man, you aren't able to earn enough and are dependent on your wife's salary for your livelihood, then she shouldn't be asked to walk out and vice versa. You need to act practically this time rather than being illogical. It's not only about you two but your entire family. 


  1. Discuss the viewpoints that differed yet more crucial than separating

Divorce comes with making a lot of decisions. You cannot stand to think that life will be at ease after having a divorce. Multiple things can bring a big turmoil. You need to discuss them at this point itself such that you both don't keep baggage to your head later. Knowing that things are even going to get more hectic after the divorce, you both work as a team and then make decisions. Sit and plan for the things ahead fairly so that none of you is suffering majorly and a load of this is divided equally on your heads. 


  1. Deep dig into your house circumstances in the last few months

At this point, you need to take a pause - & start thinking about the life you shared with your partner in the last few months. Answer yourself - Was it peaceful enough? Were you two always caught in the fight? Did both of you have opinion clashes? To what extent do you have dependability on your partner? Sit calmly and imagine what it would be like without your partner. It will help you to make the correct and healthy decisions for both. 


Few Notable Steps to Take Care

If you are the one who is stuck in such kind of scenario, then you need to take care of the following things -


  1. Things to take along if you plan to move out

Moving out forever will require a lot of effort later on. You need to think that if children are going with you, then taking birth certificates, school books, uniforms, and things for their welfare are necessary. Also, you can take things like marriage certificates and other identity verification things. 


  1. Cancellation of the Joint Bank Accounts 

Call the issuer of the credit cards or any other joint accounts, ask him to separate your accounts. It will help you to stay safe from the false claims that can happen due to the usage of money which can again turn into your next fight. You can also ask the lender to freeze your mortgage, turn the account into a deposit system only, or put across a situation where two of you would need signatures for a withdrawal of money. 


  1. Safety Measures to avoid Domestic and another kind of violence

Safety should be your utmost priority. If domestic violence and abuse of some sort are occurring to you by your partner then contact the police on the spot. The higher authorities will help you to avail yourself of safety under the family law act. What you need to do is apply for Family Court support or BC Supreme Court support.


Key Takeaways

The situation of every family is going to be different - you can't compare the bond of one couple with the other! If either of the parents can take care of the family members financially and otherwise, then that individual is likely to be the one to stay in 80% of the cases. Well, several other parameters like children's future, cooking, cleaning, accounts, also come into the picture before separating. Analyzing everything, you can make the best decision which will be in the favor and betterment of all who are going to get affected by your divorce. 


References 

https://dialalaw.peopleslawschool.ca/separation-deciding-who-will-move-out/


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