How to handle disagreement in a relationship?

 How to handle disagreement in a relationship?


What happens when a relationship goes away, and an argument breaks out? Is there a better way to turn the situation around and repair the relationship?

This article looks at some issues related to conflict in relationships and what you need to do to avoid, manage and avoid conflict in order to strengthen your relationship and hopefully make it last longer. 


Relationship Conflict

Relationship conflict can be defined as any kind of disagreement, including, for example, an argument over how to spend money or a series of ongoing disagreements.


Conflicts and disagreements cause us to anger. It may be. At work, we may try to control our anger and avoid doing things we regret. Unfortunately, at home, you are much more likely to say things that hurt others. And disagreements escalate quickly in ways that might not occur in the workplace, as there is unlikely to be someone around who can mediate.


This means that conflicts in relationships can quickly become very uncomfortable and very personal.


Unfortunately, when we are close to people, we often know how best to hurt them. Anger may be exactly what we want to do, no matter how much we regret it later.


Conflict Resolution Strategies


Roughly on his Conflict Resolution page at our company, he explains he has five conflict resolution strategies.

Rejection or avoidance. Pretend there are no problems.

Smoothes out issues that maintain surface harmony but do not resolve conflicts.

A compromise or negotiation in which both parties give up something in order to reach a compromise.

cooperation, cooperation to achieve common results

These strategies can also apply to conflicts in personal and romantic relationships.


But many people can only deny it, pretend to be calm, and fight. The problem with this, however, is that these are not long-term strategies for solving the problem. They are masking the rift, which is not possible in a long-term relationship (or if that is your chosen approach, the relationship probably won’t be long-term). Honest communication about feelings, especially the feeling that something is wrong, always works well in a relationship.


So the key to any relationship is to compromise or work together beyond these expectations


Compromises give up something in favor of an agreed compromise. Since neither side has given up on something, it is likely that neither side will be completely satisfied with the outcome, and may end up starting the discussion repeatedly. We work together in a win/win situation built on.


It takes time, but the investment in the relationship is worth it.


Towards Co-operation



Of course, the big question is how to move to a co-operate. Especially if you’ve already established a combat pattern. Here are some ideas that might help.


1. Discuss and agree on a strategy before you get angry


Dispute resolution requires commitment from both sides. Discuss in advance how you would like to handle disagreements and agree to help each other with this.


Talk about what you do when you get angry and help each other deal with it.

For example, if one person gets angry quickly, it may be helpful for the other person to suggest waiting to speak later.


A page on anger and anger management may be helpful.


2. Stop Focusing on the Unimportant Things


Focus on the important things and ignore the unimportant things.


3. Living with someone requires compromise


“The little things” are a good place to start. Minor violations of shared “rules” and he is a one-off violation. These are often unintentional, but a result of your partner being tired or just distracted.


Of course, if they become regular or really annoying, they’re worth mentioning.


You may find the page on providing feedback to partners helpful.

The Importance of Realistic Expectations


Real life is no fairy tale. You can’t live happily ever after without some kind of effort.


It is important to have realistic expectations of yourself and your partner. For example, we should expect each other to respect each other and communicate honestly.

However, it’s not realistic to expect someone to become an angel overnight (let alone act like an angel when you’re tired and hungry after a long day at work). Be realistic. 3. Do not make personal attacks. Especially personal attacks on morals, values ​​, and beliefs.


However, it is important to avoid doing this with a partner.


Words spoken in anger can be difficult to forget or forgive, no matter how much you want to say them. Instead, remember the “feedback rule” and focus on their actions and the impact they have on you.


4. Walk away when you’re angry


Make a habit of not discussing problems when you’re angry. Say something like:


“I can’t talk right now. I’m just angry. When you have calmed down, I will speak to you.”


5. Don’t talk about difficult things when you are tired or hungry


We all get grumpy and grumpy when we are tired or hungry.

It's human nature. Avoid tough conversations during difficult times. Instead, find time to relax and be comfortable. That way, the conversation is less likely to turn into an argument. Some people like to go for walks, others find it more fun to stay at home.


See the Partner Feedback and Difficult Conversations with Partners pages for more information.

6. Always be ready to apologize


You may think you are right. You might be right.


However, being willing to apologize for your partner’s feelings can go a long way in making them heard and understanding their concerns. This is especially true if you are yelling at each other despite your best intentions.


7. Apologizing doesn’t mean you have to admit you were wrong


It means that you are sorry that you had a disagreement, that you are sorry that your partner is upset, and that you are determined to work for each other. increase.


Remember...

... a long-term relationship is a partnership. You may or may not make formal commitments to each other, but if you want your relationship to last, you’ll need to develop the skills to deal with disagreements together. Learning how to disagree and build compromises and collaborations is an important part of this.


Reference-https://www.tonyrobbins.com/ultimate-relationship-guide/resolve-conflict-save-relationship/




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