Confusion is an answer. If someone can articulate their favourite team but not their intentions with you, they’re choosing blur. You deserve clarity, not crumbs.
How “Confused” Shows Up
- Hot–cold texting; “busy” until midnight.
- Future talk, zero follow-through.
- Private vibes, no public life integration.
Your Playbook
- Say what you want: “I’m looking for consistent dates and effort.”
- Ask a clarity question: “Are you interested in building something steady with me?”
- Set a timer: watch actions for two weeks—no speeches, just data.
- Match energy: stop over-initiating; let reciprocity show.
Decision Tree (Fast & Kind)
- State need: “Weekly planned dates + steady effort.”
- Ask directly: “Are you available for a steady relationship with me?”
- Start a 14-day timer: track actions, not apologies.
- Decide: consistent = continue; inconsistent = close the tab.
Red Flags vs. Repairable
- Red flags: secrecy, excuses that blame you, love-bombing then vanishing.
- Repairable: nervous but willing, asks for clarity, follows through the next time.
Upgrade Your Boundary Texts
- “I don’t do last-minute-only plans. If you want to see me, propose a day and time.”
- “Clarity keeps me calm. If you’re not ready, I’ll step back.”
- “I match energy. Reciprocity is attractive to me.”
Self-Check
After contact, do you feel steadier or spun up? Your body is data. Believe it.
Texts You Can Send
- Clarity: “Weekly plans, not last-minute only—does that work for you?”
- Boundary: “If plans aren’t confirmed by Thursday, I’ll keep my weekend free.”
- Exit: “I’m looking for consistency; this isn’t it. Wishing you well.”
If He Steps Up vs. If He Doesn’t
- Steps up: look for repeated actions, not one grand gesture.
- Doesn’t: walking away is self-respect, not drama.
Final Thoughts
Being liked isn’t the goal—being chosen is. Clarity is kind. Choose the person who chooses you back.
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