How
you can learn Body Positivity?
Loving
yourself and your body is a very obvious notion, but it is easier said than
done. Society has always focused on and appreciated only a perfect body,
without any paunch, any fat in your legs or arms, a perfect face without any
acne and marks. But it is not possible for every girl to have the standard body
type society has deemed perfect. Every girl has imperfections and the fit body
type is not something they are born with. If you want to achieve that body type
then you have to work really hard and stay on a very strict diet.
Not
having the desired body type can shake a girl’s confidence. When everyone in
society points out and judges you that you are too skinny or too fat. And, your
confidence is something that gets built on many factors like small to big
interactions about your body and yourself can shape how you feel about
yourself. Women can get bullied from a young age for their “imperfect body” and
not just at school by strangers but they get bullied at home by their parents
and relatives.
The
mainstream media is the one to blame. For a long time, the popular media have promoted
the skinny body with voluptuous breasts and lean stomach as a perfect body
type. The images of what “beauty” or “health” should look like have been pasted
on magazines from time immemorial. Those images have built reservation and the feeling
of powerlessness among girls from an early age. This vulnerability and
insecurity travel from their teenage years to their young adulthood days.
Loving
yourself can be hard after having so many insecurities and in the body type,
you naturally have. But it is important that women love themselves and their
“imperfect” bodies. And, going from insecure to love yourself can be hard.
Being in a healthy relationship can be inconsistent like any other
relationship, but once you do it’s extremely rewarding.
To have a
healthy attitude about your body patience should be the key. Take your time and
understand that you are just as strong and beautiful. There are some key
factors that can help women to have a body positivity attitude. Let me share
those factors in the hopes that you, too, can find them helpful on your journey
from being insecure to being confident and experiencing all that self-love has
to offer.
1. Understand
that media is manipulative
Popular
media has led us to believe that women with certain body types are the only ones
who are beautiful. Everywhere you look you find these skinny models with lean
stomachs, good shape ass and breasts. For a long time, there was no inclusion
of other body types in any popular media like magazines, television, and
movies. It is only recently that big organisations have started hiring and portraying
plus-size models. The body types the media deems perfect to keep on changing.
First, it was size zero but now it is a curvy body. For a long time, everyone
believed in order to be a beautiful woman, you should have a slim neck, thin
face, and flat stomach.
But now with this curvy body type, there is a not
so well-known fact about modelling. The secret is that most models pad to
appear curvy or thicker. And all of this is
to be blamed on the media for pumping out unrealistic body standards. They have
created another cookie-cutter standard body type just slightly bigger. What you
need to understand is all women aren’t created with an hourglass figure, and
that’s fine.
2. Surround
yourself with positive people
The
people you are surrounded by also make a huge difference in the way you view
yourself and your body. You should seek out people who have a positive and open
mind. Friendships and relationships you have formed will have a huge impact on
your life. They should love and support you as you are and not try to change
you drastically. Support is something everyone needs and craves. And, you can
get that support in many forms like friends, family, and even
an online community.
If
you do not have the desired support you need in your real life then maybe you
can find them in an online community and finding proper representation is key.
But with some positivity, there’s also much room for negativity online. You
need to follow at least three or four people online who give a positive message
about anything. With this, you will realize that there are other people out
there who are going through the same thing and think and feel the same way as
you is reassuring.
3. Stop
comparing yourself to others
Following this can be hard. As humans, we have
this urge we compare ourselves and our lives with others. This is one of the
biggest things that can bring your confidence down. It has increased with social
media. Everyone’s life looks like as they say #goals on social media. But as
the saying goes “All that glitters is not gold.”
Their
perfect sunny, easy life, with their perfect body, is not as it looks like.
Even if it does, you should not compare yourself to them. Each and every
person’s body is different and remember every body type is beautiful.
4. Realize
you are your own worst critic
It
is true that when you stare at something long enough, you’ll find flaws in it. And,
you see your body in the most detail most of the time. This means you are likely
to have taken the time to pick apart every little thing. The average normal everyday
people you pass by don’t have the same time as you, and won’t likely notice the
tiny details you criticize about yourself.
Realize
your body is not as bad as you might think. It’s ok to take time to improve
yourself. But don’t be so critical of yourself that you set unrealistic
expectations for yourself and your body. You’ll go crazy trying to achieve them.
5. Rather
than thinking skinner think healthier
Being healthy does not
always entail you being skinny. When you are preparing your meals or hitting
the gym, don’t make your fitness goals in accordance with a number you’d like
to see on the scale. Exercising and eating a healthy diet shouldn’t be
punishment. We should show respect and appreciation for our bodies by not
overdoing exercise and following a healthy diet. Instead of thinking about your
body like how much it weighs and how it’s shaped you should think about enjoying
your body with all the amazing things it can do, all the places it can take
you, and the experience it will bring you. Celebrate your body by having nourishing
meals and exercises that you actually enjoy.
6. Compliment
others without any hesitancy
To learn body positivity,
we should not only learn to love our body but others too. It happens oftentimes
that we project our own insecurities onto other people. We are judgemental and
judge them harshly because of our own insecurities. But when we are kind to
others, it also makes us be kinder to ourselves. So, compliment someone when
they deserve it without any hesitancy. Praise their achievements and looks you
wished you’d gotten when you needed them most. Be someone else’s silver lining and
maybe someday when you are feeling down they will be yours.
7. Focus
on yourself as a whole person
Being body-positive is
not just about loving your own body. It is much more than it and always
remember you are so much more than your looks. The irony of loving your body
and having a healthy body image is to stop fixating on your body. You should spend
more time thinking about other things than your physical appearance. Cultivate
a hobby, follow your passions, and build a happy life. Hang out with your
friends, go to dinners or lunches and catch a movie with a friend. Your body
isn’t just a decorative piece for people to look at; it’s for doing. So, get
out there and make your body useful.
8. Do
not try to fit into a smaller size dress but rather buy a dress that fits your
body.
How many times have you heard from
a woman or girl that they are trying to lose weight to fit into the dress they like?
Either it is for some big day or for just some casual dress. You never hear
this sentence-I am gaining weight to try and fit in that dress. This is not a
good habit and it has been fuelled by popular movies and TV shows where you see
girls trying to lose weight to get into a certain dress. This notion is wrong
on so many levels. You should stop trying to fit your body in a dress that is
some size smaller than yours. It can also be depressing when you find out that
your old clothes no longer fit you. But instead of being depressed with
thoughts that you no longer fit into our favorite pair of jeans, you can donate
them. Buy clothes that make you feel great in and not small sizes.
9.
Learn to accept a compliment
It can get awkward if you do not
know how to react to a compliment. By not knowing how to take a compliment, you
are putting yourself down. Learn to accept it graciously and sincerely. First
of all, you should avoid responding to a compliment with “Thank you, but…”. Just
show gratitude by responding with a “Thank You.” You can also respond to a
compliment by returning a compliment.
Always be careful not to undervalue yourself.
10. Focus
on the stuff you like about yourself
The last tip is to focus
on the good stuff of yourself. Counter any negative thoughts about your body
with something positive. Making lists of the things you like about your body
can be helpful. And do not only write about how it looks but the things it
allows you to do and how it makes you feel. List it all out because we humans are naturally
inclined to look for negative things and simply overlook the good things. To
change our way of thinking, it will take daily perseverance, so, just keep at
it.
In conclusion, I would
like to talk about how not only obese but skinny girls are judged. You will
hear constant comments by people saying stuff like don’t you eat, do your
family gives you nothing to eat and many other things. All these constant judgements
from people on how you need to lose your weight or how you need to gain weight
just wreck a woman completely and they start hating their body, trying to
change them. You should always remember that trying to get in better shape is
not necessarily a bad thing but you should not overdo it and if you are doing
it make sure you do it for yourself rather than for others.
References:
https://wellbeingtrust.org/bewell/10-ways-to-practice-body-positivity/