Dating: Expectations vs. Reality

 Dating: Expectations vs. Reality

Dating expectations and reality can be totally different in real life.

Expectations can differ from reality for dating and relationships. You may know the meme that contrasts what we think about versus what’s really going on in our dating life. Most of the time, it has proven to be true.

We often talk about ‘relationship goals’ in various contexts, such as online dating and marriage. Sometimes these goals translate into achievable benchmarks that need to be reached, or sometimes we’re doing something wrong.

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We were in a long-distance relationship, traveled the distance (literally the ocean), and now lived together. Here are some observations and advice we learned along the way, showing the difference between dating expectations and reality!

Dating/Life Isn’t Always Perfect. I have a big idea that I won’t. Like every moment is perfect. Every scenario, every day, every experience - pure perfection. This is far away from reality.

An example you can refer to is travel. On a cliff, by a waterfall, or (insert scenic travel location), you can see the perfect photo of that perfect kiss on social media.

What you probably don’t see are dozens of other people. The couple had to go around getting the perfect shot. They also didn’t see a difficult 5-hour hike where the equipment was heavy, the weather may not have been perfect, and we may have argued once or twice for various reasons along the way. 

All we’re trying to say is that dates can be curated to look “perfect.” We need to delve into the ‘behind-the-scenes of these photos to understand what the reality of dating someone is like. It won’t look the same to everyone, but it’s definitely going to be more complicated than some pictures you see.

Humans have terrible moments

A man and a woman are sitting on the couch, and the woman is looking away

Humans are not always happy..we have so many emotions and actions, some of which are inexplicable. So, it shouldn’t be surprising to find that your partner doesn’t always react the way you want them to. That applies to good and bad.

Basically, I want to say that not every moment is perfect, and not every reaction is perfect. Things go wrong, there are delays, wrong orders, etc. Whatever the issue, there’s a lot to be said about how we react to the situation.

On social media, another couple is going through a tough time, and you’ll eventually need to reveal different aspects of your personality if you want your partner to know all about you. It doesn’t appear when you’re in or when you reach the last straw. They don’t see the terrible moments in their relationship - but that doesn’t mean they don’t exist. This is an enormous blunder we make.

So if you’ve had a critical moment while dating or in a relationship, remember that it probably happens to many other couples as well.

Dating is expensive

Wallet with money on a wooden background

Don’t feel you have to do everything you see in movies…

If you want the same experience, you see in movies and on social media, What you should know is that many of these cost money. Go to the cinema, buy dinner, play mini-golf, and take a cute rowing boat to the swan pond.

-. It costs a lot!

We are not trying to spend money on dating. There are tons of great paid and free date ideas out there.

The problem we have is when people expect money to be used to achieve the perfect date. Some people may think that it means she doesn’t like me. Spending money has become the norm, but maintaining this in dating is dangerous. What happens in difficult times when money is tight? Basically, it doesn’t get any better or more beautiful.

We are very materialistic and appreciate free experiences such as hiking and walking around town, so we never really started with this issue. We knew what people wanted out of a date (which matched our passions), so we went from there.

Be patient and don’t give up

Being single for a while and having a lot of fun but one day finding that special someone to spend my life with I think I want to do. I’m not really looking for a fun date (hopefully), but I’d like to find a special and lasting relationship with someone I can really connect with. Always been a ‘relationship type’... I’m not the type to have one-night stands, date primarily for sex, or date many women to boost my ego.

That being said, dating life has been difficult for many reasons. Maybe I’m getting too hung up on the dating process, maybe I’m just picking the wrong woman, and many of my friends are already married or in happier relationships.

 So maybe it’s just my age (over 40). I thought it would be worthwhile to share my views on dating expectations and realities. I have learned to be very patient in my dating life because of this. So a few women and she might date for a month. We understand you need to be online all the time on dating sites and in real life, but I have found it easier to let dating life come to you without trying too hard.

Dating can be hard work

Husband and wife snuggle up on the couch, dating expectations, and realities.

It may seem easy, but it’s not always... Used in dating: They try. It takes effort to grow with someone.

Getting to know someone deeply, making agreements, resolving conflicts, and deciding all require effort and effort the first few times.

I know from experience that they work hard. We had the advantage of being able to talk before we first met, so we had a pretty good idea of ​​where the other person’s head was on a lot of things. Being cross-cultural and surviving long distances helped! However, this story is not fully prepared when physically together.


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