Signs you are being woke fished in a relationship
While the internet and contemporary technology have streamlined the process for us to find love, it has also made it much simpler for us to manipulate that love and our lovers to suit our emotions and desires. And to add to this list of deceptive dating strategies, "woke-fishing" is the phrase used to describe someone who presents themselves as having more progressive ideals than they actually do. Being "awake," a phrase used to describe having an awareness of social justice issues, is a result of that. But this one goes a step further because it involves being "awake" in front of a possible date. Most men will exaggerate their level of sophistication to earn your favor.
Simply described, "woke-fishing" is the practice of pretending to embrace liberal political beliefs to woo potential mates. A woke fish may initially come across as an intersectional feminist who is sex-positive, anti-racist, and a protester, but in reality, they don't give a damn. Or, as is frequently the case, they actively behave in a contrary manner in their personal life. It is similar to catfishing, but with political opinions.
We've all been woke fished to some extent. Perhaps now more than ever. In recent months, crises like the sad murder of George Floyd and the coronavirus epidemic have brought societal inequities into even sharper perspective. As a result, there has been a significant increase in the emphasis placed on individual agency in the urgent destruction of oppressive systems. It is not surprising that singles are now actively seeking out companions who share their values and that others are changing to get around this.
How to spot a wokefisher
It's one thing to use your knowledge to win someone over; it's quite another to act like someone you're not. Online dating is no different from traditional dating in that it takes time to get to know someone. The most important relationship rule is to not believe everything someone says or reveal too much about yourself. Numerous non-verbal clues can also indicate a wokefisher; for example, you can see him or her being unsure when you pose a question during a video chat. It's a warning sign when someone tries too hard to win your trust. Give the guy some thought. He might claim to be a feminist, for example, yet frequently refers to women in a demeaning manner. We are drawn to those who affirm or claim to share our beliefs on particular subjects. However, you shouldn't make it a must; search outside of your own mental sphere as well.
Signs you are being woke fished
Here are four warning signs that you're being "woke fished" during dating, to help you avoid being tricked.
He falls short of his pledges.
He starts off by complimenting your dedication to your job before going on to continuously criticize it while acting as though it's all in good fun. Your life can be completely changed by a toxic individual, and before you know it, their priorities have taken precedence over your own. This man would never date a woman with a dark complexion, despite his complaints against racism. In this circumstance, your partner might not be in tune with his emotions, which would make all they say and do invalid.
His behavior screams disguised gender bias.
Even most progressive people sometimes use gender stereotypes, but in a relationship, this can be especially harmful because your partner may treat you differently due to their own gender assumptions. If your partner demands that you dress and groom yourself to a flawless standard and complains that the way you look can "provoke" attention from others, he is misogynistic. Finally, it's critical to realize that wokefishers may resort to deception if their behavior has been exposed to win your trust. It is often advised to let go and move on in such situations
He is deceiving people, as you can see.
No matter how convincing he may be with you, his prejudices will show when he is around other people. Pay close attention to his conduct so you can see how he acts with people he doesn't want to date. If the guy lacks social skills and may even snap out at you in the future, it is futile to worry about loneliness or to think you will never find another companion who is so attentive.
Laying the foundation for a potential connection on a false premise.
Future relationships based on deceit will unavoidably come to an unhappy conclusion. People are under some pressure right now to take part in discussions on racial issues, exhibiting compassion for others, the environment, and local and international reform. In other words, some people mislead because they know they won't advance if they don't appear to care.
How can you avoid being woke fished?
Talk, talk, talk! The majority of issues in the world could be resolved by communication, and this is no different. Ask someone directly what they believe about something if they seem to be fumbling or lying about it. Ask them directly if they are trying to hide how they voted; they are unlikely to lie if you just ask. A simple way to tell whether someone's politically "woke" chat-up line or bio is cringe-worthy but true, or a sleight of hand intended to get you in bed, is to have actual, meaningful, in-depth talks with them before you meet. Decide where you draw the line, and if anything makes you feel uncomfortable, just walk away.
It will be beneficial to take your time and trust yourself. My recommendation is to slow things down, date other people, and quit the relationship as soon as you feel confident that the person is not trying to be someone or something else. Genuine connections develop over time, so step back if you're not completely sold on someone.
Why does it matter?
It matters because lying of any kind in a dating setting is ultimately problematic. It's not always dishonesty or anything more than boyish exaggeration if someone exaggerates their accomplishments or pretends to love a book you do to impress you on a first date. In actuality, whether in a romantic setting or not, we all engage in it when we like someone and want to appear cool. A possible relationship that is built on lies will always end in tears.
However, claiming to care about what matters most to you—your politics or your identity, to have sexual relations with you during a moment when politics and activism mean more than ever is quite messy.
Building a new relationship based on lies will inevitably result in heartbreak. Because of the need for dialogues about race, the environment, being nice to others, and political change on a worldwide scale, work fishing in particular is on the increase. As a result, people feel pressure to participate in these conversations. In essence, some people lie since they are aware that if they don't act concerned, they won't receive any.
Dating and relationship experts concur that lying in general and woke fishing, in particular, are risky. People pretending to be someone they are not is one of the reasons why so many relationships fail, but regrettably, in the long run, it will reveal incompatibility. Relationships based on mistrust are certain to fail. the victim may also suffer long-term psychological harm. Those who have been the victims of the woke-fishing masquerade may start to mistrust themselves. It is comparable to experiencing gaslighting.
Nowadays, finding someone special can be as easy as "swiping right." The variety of dating applications that are available today has simplified the process of meeting possible partners considerably. However, online relationships can have their share of ills, such as catfishing, the act of someone providing a false photograph or lying about their age, ghosting, or even dial toning, in which the other person provides you their phone number but never answers when you call. And the new phrase "woke-fishing" just adds to the long list of unfavorable dating habits. Yes, it is a byproduct of being "woke," which is a term used to describe a perception of awareness of social justice issues.