Here's Why You Shouldn't Use "Hey" as a Pickup Line on Dating Apps


Here's Why You Shouldn't Use "Hey" as a Pickup Line on Dating Apps


Let's get one thing straight: Unless you're deliberately attempting to be ignored, saying "hello" or "hi" or any other variation of it is not the greatest method to strike up a conversation on a dating app. In that situation, move ahead without hesitation. I nearly guarantee that you will wind up in the stack of unsuccessful matches.

In actuality, saying "hello" to a friend or coworker could be a completely fine approach to strike up a discussion. You begin with "hello" and end with a Stranger Things debriefing. But here's how it works: You are not approaching a person with whom you are already acquainted. You're speaking to an online stranger who is probably trying to put a wager on which online strangers they should speak to while fending off the growing numbness that comes with looking through three billion dating profiles. He is at best uninteresting and at worst enrage-inspiring.

Hey is simply insufficient. This is in part because you're presenting yourself to the person you're seeking to connect with, just like you are with your images, bio, and other profile features. Additionally, you only have a little window to present your case before someone decides whether or not to give you their time. A simple "hey" does not imply seriousness, an attempt, or a guarantee of future polite dialogue.

In conclusion, saying "hello" is the worst thing since wearing socks and stepping on a wet patch on your kitchen floor. Not at all. Just. Avoid doing it.

What say you, then?

Folks, this isn't science at all. The antidote to a soul-crushingly generic greeting, though, is spending some time looking at the profile of the other person. Try posing a query in response to something they've said. Do they enjoy cooking? Inquire about their preferred recipe. Do you enjoy live music? Find out which musicians they want to see live. Big fan of Star Wars? Inquire as to why Obi-Wan Kenobi won't dress in disguise.

You're merely attempting to establish a rapport before veering into a more casual conversation about whatever matters to both of you. The first communication is just a minor obstacle to get in the way of deciding whether you want to meet up in person or if the other person has the personality of a damp mop.

However, you can also send a GIF of a waving panda or search the internet for witty starting statements like "Does pineapple belong on pizza?" You certainly can. It could work. But I'd argue that the technique of conversation-starting is a little bit assembly-line-like.

Remember that it's simple to feel like you're on some sort of nightmare, crowded merry-go-round when it comes to internet dating. Just consider how pleasant it would be to receive a message from someone who seemed interested in you.

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